THE Busy Child

We covered what a high maintenance baby is.  But what happens when that baby does not even out, and continues on this path?  She goes from a high maintenance baby to a high maintenance child.

OMG, seriously, you just did that!!!  Okay, no don’t climb on that, you can’t play PJ Masks on the bunk bed, and no you are not Owlette.  Poop goes in the toilet, not on the floor.  The tub is NOT a toilet.  The toilet is not a water pool to play in.  No, I don’t know how far away the moon is, and no, we cannot take a plane to the moon.  No, Heaven is not something you can fly in a plane to.  We cannot go to Mexico today, it is a long long way away.  Daddy can’t go yet we have to wait our turn.  No, you cannot poke the boy in the eye just because you didn’t like what he said.  And no, you cannot run up and down the isles of the school bus just because you’re bored.

These are just a few of the comments that I say on a daily basis.  And no, it’s not just Owlette…fairy dust is dangerous too, because who knows where she may try to fly to and how.  When I have company that my busy buggies are comfortable with it soon becomes a mad house here.  When I first moved into my neighborhood, my middle buggy (Belly Bug) was quickly earned the lable, by children and parents alike, the naughty child.people-217250_1280

There are many names high maintenance children are called.  Here are a few:

  • High maintenance child
  • High spirited child
  • Spirited child
  • Busy child
  • High energy
  • Naughty
  • Bad

That’s just to list a few.  Often many of the names are automatically related to children who are too difficult to deal with and naughty and bad, or even troublemakers.  We’ve all done it.  And some of us are on the other end.  Yes, our children make sleep for us irregular.  And sleeping in their own beds is so not as much fun as sleeping in your bed.  However, even though this children have their difficulties, they will also make you laugh the hardest, workout (even if you hadn’t scheduled it), think harder, and be more creative.  Because they are persistent, you too learn more persistence.  And patience is definitely taught with a busy child.

So, what is a Busy Child?

Most of the time a busy child is described as the “More,” child.  As in they are more of everything they do, and want more in everything they do.  But here are some descriptions to let you know if you have that busy child.

Intense Emotions – Every emotion the busy child has is HUGE, GINORMOUS, and GIGANTIC all at once.  Around here I tell people that they have the same reaction for everything….they screech at the top of their lungs.  Often I wonder if a neighbor is going to call the police because it is always loud in my house.  Although, luckily for me, most people around my neighborhood know my children.  In first meetings and new surroundings these children take shyness to the next level, but once they get comfortable….

Full of Energy – Now, I’m always loaded up on energy things, coffee…mountain dew…etc… And I still could not have the energy my busy buggies have. Once these two get going in the morning they don’t stop.  The energizer bunny can’t hold a candle to these two.  And you better hope you don’t have to pee…these two can tear the house apart in two seconds flat.

Persistent – “Mommy, I want a cookie, mommy, I want a cookie, mommy I want a cookie…mooooooommmmmyyyy……cookie pleeeeeeease….please, please, please, please, please, please…..”  Yep, I’ve heard that, or a version of it today, at least 50 times from both of my busy buggies.  The bonus side to this is that they will be persistent in trying something they want really bad.  So if it is a build set or something, they will sit there until they get it or have a melt down because they cannot.  They are also persistent in helping if it is something thye like and want to do.  Mine like to mow the lawn.  This is a little scary because I worry that they will try to go and start the mower without their daddy.  Or they like to work on the car, because daddy does it.  And if you blink, they’re underneath a vehicle trying to tinker with things with a random tool they found or snuck into daddy’s toolbox and collected for their work.  And explaining it…hold on to your big girl panties…It takes a bit, but I do have one of the two busy buggies that finally understand that she cannot fix things without daddy to help.

Perceptive – The busy child notices everything around them.  This causes the, “Oh, look, SHINY!!!” effect often times because they do notice everything, therefore distracting them from their current thing they are focusing on.  Often it seems as if they are not listening.  I’ve even had people ask if Belly Bug has a hearing problem, as in a possible medical problem causing her not to hear.  I normally say, “yeah it is calld S.H.S.  The Selective Hearing System.”  She hears what she wants to hear.  The reality is that she is focused so hard on something that everything else is tuned out for the moment.

Irregular – Sleeping and eating habits change daily.  I may get a break from one bug because she actually ate her lunch, and later she comes back for her snack thinking she should clean the cupboards out for a snack. I mean literally eat everything she can find.  And if you said no, she’ll just wait until you have to go to the bathroom and help herself.  One day she’ll take a nap just fine, then be up at 2 or 3 in the morning thinking it’s play time.  You never really know what you’ll get, and you have to just roll with it.

Moody – While my busy buggies mostly have the sunny personality, many are the serious and analytical type.  They see what is wrong with everything.  Mine are similar, but often find what is right with it.  However, if the sunny busy bug gets into a serious and analytical mood…watch out.  You really cannot tell when the swing will happen, but when it does you surely can notice.  Mornings here can be rough.  Belly Bug always wakes up grumpy and generally moves to sunny.  If she got up on the wrong side of the bed though, she can be a terror to deal with.  But then again, just because she’s in a sunny disposition doesn’t mean you are going to have an easy time with her.  Just means you might be hiding your smirk when you are trying to reprimand her for one thing or another.

Sensitive – Everything can bother, stimulate, and potentially over stimulate a busy child.  Getting dressed in the morning is a task because aside from the pretty colors she wants to wear…all at once… There is the feel of the clothing.  How they sit.  And sometimes, just the feel of any clothing is absolutely intolerable to children that are busy.  Do Bug HATES socks.  She will wear them until the shoes come off. Recently in the colder days she will keep them on longer, and sometimes all day.  Otherwise they are lost to the local sock monster…wherever he resides.  It surely isn’t just the laundry room.  And Belly Bug will often strip down to her big girls the second she is home from school.  Company…oh well, hope you like Olaf big girls, because it is likely both Do and Belly are running around in a matching pair.

Doesn’t Adapt well – School, daycare, moving, new additions to the family, or basic family adjustments (like someone moving in or out, or leaving the family in some type).  All of these can be hard for anyone.  The busy child takes longer than most children to adjust and adapt to the change.  We had a family member live with us for a while.  Adjusting to him being with us was interesting…teaching personal space to the new addition was almost impossible.  Especially when the adult is too nice to say anything to the kids.  And when he left….tears, and fits, and the like.  And when I gave his bedroom to Do Bug to give them more room….you would have thought it was World War III…  And school…yes, you need to prepare the average child.  You need to really, extra prepare for an anxious or shy child, and you really, really, extra, extra, truly prepare your busy child.  But sometimes there just isn’t enough preparation.boy-1058829_1280

Highly Focused – This is where the S.H.S kicks in high gear.  When your busy bug is focused, there is nothing to do to break it.  If Paw Patrol is on and it is a good episode, you could clap, scream shout, jump up and down, do a head stand….nothing will break their focus.  Later on when this can be applied to other areas it could be wonderful.  But they only focus on what they want at this point, and breaking that focus is almost impossible.

 

So What Does This Mean…

Well, it means you have your hands full.  It means that patience is a virtue you will have to learn, and learn quickly.  It means that you have a child that is going to grow to be a leader, passionate in their calling, and strong in their convictions.  These are our future leaders in our communities and more.  We just have to help them focus.  Guide them, into the appropriate uses of the qualities they are good at.  Attention to detail, focus, persistence, and just plain being stubborn can come in handy when they are adults if they learn to harness that and their emotions.269H

We mothers are not alone in this.  You TRUELY are not the only one with a busy child.  Don’t let others put you or your child down.  If they don’t like that she looks like a blur at the park, simply find another mother to talk to.  Everyone that has a child will see that child melt in the middle of a public place from time to time.  Whether they want to admit it or not.  Take pride in the fact that God has gifted you a future leader, and chosen you to lead them into the correct path.

Hang in there Mama.  It’s only just begun.  But here we can come together and share and trade experiences, and know we’re not alone.

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