Why Start a Blog?

Why did start my blog?

I live in a small town, and mommy groups are slim to none.  Closer to the none category.  So, I chose to make my own mommy group online.  I wanted to connect mothers that have a difficult time themselves and feel alone due to how their children may act.

I do not have any degrees.  All I have is the life that I live, and what I’ve been through in the past.  I DO talk about God, because he is a part of my life, and my life only got better when I accepted Jesus into my heart.  And I am proud to share my views on this end.

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In the past I’ve always felt pulled to help people.  I am the one that my friends came to, even in school, about their problems.  And I’m definitely not talking about boy problems.

As an adult, I’ve helped friends make choices, and to step away from bad situations.  I’ve even helped some settle back into life, while they are holding fear that their ex is going to come back to haunt them.  I’ve used my experiences to explain possibilities, and even gone as far as driving friends to a counselor.  Looking for the correct place for them to get the help that they need.

I’ve said before, there are depressing situations that can keep us down often.  I’ve actually been there myself.  I’ve had counselors tell me they didn’t know what else to say to me because I told them exactly what they would say.  But, sometimes it isn’t enough.  Sometimes we need to know someone who has actually experienced it.  It’s the empathy in the situation that makes it easier to accept that you are not alone.

Since I’ve had children.

Since I’ve had children, I’ve been asked loads about how I do this or that.  And the actual inspiration to write this blog specifically came from a friend of mine.  It started back when her baby was about 6 months old.  The snow finally slowed and was mostly gone before my friend started coming to see me again.  We live very close, but in cold and snow, It’s difficult for me to get places, so I hole up at home.

So, she finally was able to make it and bring me to see that sweet little bug.  But my friend looked a mess.  Bags under her eyes, and fully stressed to the max.  121HI asked her what was wrong, and she explained in full detail to me.  She couldn’t set the baby down to even take a shower.  No one can hold her except herself.  She would only sleep for small increments, and it had to be right on her mommy’s shoulder and neck.

My friend actually started the research on her own, so after she finished explaining she told me that her buggy was a high maintenance baby.  However, she only had basics about it.  So she showed me the site she looked at, Dr. Sears High Maintenance baby.  (They’ve got great information.)

I started that night by telling he she needed some help, and we went over some options of how to do just that.  She went home so she could try to get a bit of sleep.  But, I couldn’t sleep that night.  Instead I spent the night researching it, and matching my children to the same thing.  Understanding at that moment that was why I could rarely get a baby sitter.  Why family and friends would only take my oldest and one of the other two or just my oldest.

The thing was that I had felt stuck, myself.  And now, one of my closest friends was going through the same thing.  No one would help her, because her buggy would cry all the time.  So, as I helped her work through this, I did the best that I could to help.  We had started a once a week for three hours at a time to help socialize her baby.

Between life happening, and the last time I watched the baby she tried to vault out of my arms.  We had to stop the set up.  However, by this time, that cute little buggy started letting daddy hold her.  But, through this time, I allowed myself to get closer to my friend as well as a few others.  And when I spoke to my friends, we’d talk about different parenting techniques.  Which ones we thought were wrong, which ones we thought worked, as well as techniques we thought would work for others, but not for our children.

What does that have to do with my blog?

Well, all these experiences and a lot of prayer, told me that I needed to use this to help others.  And if I could help just one, then I’ve made the world just a bit better.  If I could just figure out how to reach out to those mommies like me, then I could help a lot of people, and start building a large community so we all could help each other.

But how could I tie children and adult life experiences together?  I haven’t met many people who are mothers in my current situation that have gone through what I have.  In fact, most people I know that have been in the same shoes as I am still feel stuck in that spot.  So, how do you reach those people?

How many times a day do we google something?  If you can google it, you can connect to it.  So a blog fit the how.  I just had to put the why together and start sending it out to everyone.

My goal is to help as many as I can.  And my start is here.  Just to make a tiny difference.  Because most times it is the small things that make someone’s life.  The smile that changed the outlook on some one that had hit that rocky bottom.  And the hello that made them want to get up and climb to the top.

Have you ever hit rock bottom and felt alone?  Tell me about it.  If you don’t feel comfortable commenting below, and would like to tell me privately, then send me a message.

Don’t Be Afraid of Technology

In the past few weeks I’ve covered many low-cost options for learn and play.  But, there is a way to utilize the things we use on a daily basis for learn and play.  And, no I’m not talking about the pots and pans and wooden spoons your bug just pulled out to play the drums and serenade you with their song.

Seriously though.  You’re reading this right now, on the computer or your phone.  And most phones used today are smart phones which are basically a tiny computer and phone rolled into one.

Often I’ve seen many parents hand a baby a phone so they can play candy crush or watch a music video, or anything really, to occupy them.  Sometimes it intrigues them, other times they are more interested in turning your phone into their new teething toy.

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I use my phone on a daily basis.  I use my computer at least that much as well.  Our children watch us do this, and they want to do what mommy and daddy are doing.  So, naturally, this is one of the most common things they want to go for.  As a matter of fact, I’ve locked my phone and computer just to keep my buggies from being able to get into it and change things around.  I’ve actually had to re-download things because my two-year old likes to rearrange and delete things on my phone.  (She also likes to hide it in mysterious places so mommy can’t take it away from her.)

Children are sponges, and they learn by watching us.  They take on our mannerisms and will do and say things that we do.  So, by allowing them the privilege to use our computers and phones is only teaching them earlier what they will need to know in the future.

But what should I allow my buggies to do on the computer?

You can download a lot of apps for free.  Think about how many people play candy crush?  They advertise it everywhere, and it is free to download and play.  Yes, you could make in-game purchases, but that’s a game for you.  So why wouldn’t we look for games that our children can play and learn?

I personally use google play.  And, since my husband only knows how to use what I show him to use, I am the one that downloads the games for the kids.  We use his tablet because it is larger than the phones, and has more storage.  Currently, these are the games my buggies play:

  • 1st Grade Activities
  • First Grade Learning Games
  • Kids Complete Learning
  • School Learning
  • Games for Kids Learning
  • Kindergarten Activities
  • Kids Learning Kindergarten
  • Kids Math
  • Numero U Know
  • Kids Sight Words
  • Days of the Week
  • My body Parts
  • MyBodyParts
  • Human Body Pats
  • Panda Preschool
  • Preschool and Kindergarten Activities
  • Toddler and Preschool
  • Fruits & Vegetables
  • Kids Learning Fruits
  • Fruits and vegetables
  • Veggie Point
  • Colors for Kids
  • Learning Colors
  • A for apple
  • Learning Kids ABCs
  • FruitsABC
  • Pre-K Learning Game ABC
  • Trip To Jungle
  • Animals And Birds
  • Animal Zone

You may notice I have multiple games for one category type of learning.  I do that so that I can watch which one or ones my buggies work with best.  Sometimes I go back and uninstall some that do not work for us.  Other times, I switch them back and forth so that I can take advantage of each aspect of the free game.

The buggies think they are getting a treat, and in all actuality, they’re learning.  When you know that your buggy might be behind in an area, handing them a tablet where they have to practice those things, but in a game form, makes the experience much easier for them to take in.

Also, I have noticed, if I hand my buggies the computer, they are actually quiet and concentrating.  However, busy work for the busy buggies is just not their thing.

So, go give it a try.  Do a search in google play or where ever you get your apps from, and look up learning games.  Then when they ask you if they can play on the computer or play a video game, hand them a learning game, so that they are having fun and learning.child-148150_1280

One quick note on this.  Personally I limit the time they have on these devices so that they are not so involved with these that they do not get time to go run and play with their friends.  Also, limited time on the tablet makes it that much more fun.  Just like rotating toys is almost like new toys every time.

Supervision is also very important.  It takes seconds for your buggy to hit the wrong button (or right button, depending on how you look at it,) and then get into something else.  And with free access to YouTube, google with the speech access, you don’t know what your buggy will get into or accidentally download to your device.  So keep close eye on them while you let them have their tablet time.

Also, sitting with them and getting them moving in the right direction by playing the game with them gives them confidence to take over and do more learning on their own.  My little Belly Bug was having problems with learning her colors.  So, with implementing the computer games as well as other learn and play games, she is retaining the knowledge she needs.  Sometimes we all need to look at things differently to learn a new thing.  We all have different ways of learning things.  We just need to find what works for our buggies.

Sooo…Happy Searching!!!

Get out there on your favorite app store and download some free learning games for your buggies.  And the next time you hand your bug your phone to help calm them, make it a learning game, instead of candy crush or a movie.

Leave a comment below, and let me know some of your favorite apps for learning.

Tips and Tricks To Balance Busy Children

On March 8th, I discussed what a busy child was. Just a quick recap, this list describes a busy child.

  • Intense Emotions
  • Full of Energy
  • Persistent
  • Perceptive
  • Irregular
  • Moody
  • Sensitive
  • Doesn’t adapt well
  • Highly Focused

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So let’s break it down.

From the time they wake up, until the time they finally go to sleep, these buggies are at top speed. How does a mother prepare for that? Well, just like with the high maintenance baby, the big key is to sleep when they do, so you are not run down. You have to look at these buggies with a very positive disposition, and explain things to them often to help them keep focus, and prepare yourself on how to divert their attention and focus when needed.

The moods of our buggies can change frequently as it is, but add in the busy child, and you’ll notice that they hold grudges longer, and can remember when you didn’t give them candy, etc., etc., etc. That doesn’t mean bribe them to like you, but you will have to work at it if you lose their trust. I’m already a firm believer that if you promise something you should follow through. Broken promises hurt, no matter how little you think they are, they mean the world to a buggy. And to a sensitive soul, it hurts even more.

Each emotion is intense, and each mood can change rapidly. Our little buggies are difficult to get into a schedule, but once they are there, you cannot stray. They will even let you know, when they are older, that you changed something or missed something in their schedule. Also, by scheduling them, you are getting them focused on what they need to be doing, which can help them remove focus from something they shouldn’t be doing.

Give these buggies something to do. If you’re cooking or cleaning, and they are doing anything they can to get your attention, including intentionally doing something they shouldn’t. Get them involved in what you are doing. Today, I was washing and drying dishes.   Belly Bug just wouldn’t let me do my thing, so I asked her if she wanted to help. She was over joyed, and helped mama dry dishes. When she was done, she happily went outside, and kept the rules in mind, to play with her sister. And also let them know when it is time to help mommy and when it is time to find something else to do. A promise to help mommy with something later, may be all the redirection your buggy needs.

Remember, they’re persistent, so that means you’ll have to be as well. If at first you don’t succeed, don’t be surprised if it takes fifty tries to get it through their head. And don’t be afraid to involve the other parent. When I’m at my end, I send her off to daddy bug, and he does the same.256H

Build a Support Group

Build a line of support, to help you on your way. People you love and trust. I personally have family that helps me when I need to. The rest I try to work into a schedule that fits our whole family here. If it doesn’t work, I push it into something that does work. Having a friend or family member that you can talk to when you need to vent. And don’t vent in front of your child. You don’t want them to think that they are so naughty you can’t stand them.

Hang in there mama, you are soooo not alone.

After Holiday Recovery

After the holidays I normally have quite a clean up to consider.  Now mix that in with the inability to bounce back like I used to.  What do you have?  A never-ending mess that is so unorganized you just don’t want to even attempt to conquer it.

So…What to do?

Much like when you are trying to add new healthy life changes, mixing in holiday clean up with spring clean up is ideal, but intimidating.  You want to add in one thing at a time.  Or in the cleaning end of it, you may want to conquer one room at a time.  Maybe even break that down into sections.

After holidays, and during spring cleaning, I like to go through all of my cupboards.  See what I need and what I don’t need.  As well as see what got shoved back into never-never land.  And, while I do this, I can add in my new version of my inventory list.

My biggest thing I do after holidays is reorganize.  Normally my cupboards have been so disrupted because somebody needed something, and I may or may not have been the one to get it.  That little treasure hunt disrupts the majority of my kitchen.  And, if grandpa bug helps do the dishes afterwards (which he always does, bless his heart), there is often things put where I wouldn’t normally put them.  I won’t say anything, because it truly is the thought that counts.

Again, the list, but this time I empty out the ENTIRE cabinet.  This allows me to move things around as well as clean the actual cabinet.  Then, as I put them back in, I write them on my list, and keep it with the cupboard I was working on.

During this time, I am getting an idea of my daily and holiday staples I am using, and I can make it a more user-friendly way, by putting things where they may work better for myself.  Things I use more often go in an easy to reach and front position to my cabinets so I can grab them at a faster pace.

I normally have my flour, sugar, and other baking items up front because I do a lot of baking.  My gum paste, food color, and fondant go in a higher cupboard, or farther back in the baking cupboard, as I do not use them as much.  With this system I also know that my flour and sugar are my staple items.  I am normally picking those items up in a grocery run.  Therefore, I can also create a shopping list that I need to have, and keep them in groups that makes it easier at the store.

Any way you do it, is going to be a good way, so long as it works for you.  And trying different ways, until you find the perfect sweet spot is a great way to do it.  What are your after holiday, spring cleaning, or organization routines you use in your kitchen?cabinet-334128_1920

It’s Easter!

Happy Easter to Everyone!!!

I hope all of you are going to have a wonderful Easter.  I’m posting this early to try to get a bit a head of the festivities.

Every Year…

Every year around this time we are doing so much (yes, I know it has been, kind of, a theme this week), and today is no different.  All week-long you’ve prepared your house, food, planned, planned, and planned some more.  You made it this far, through egg hunts and probably many other things.  And now, it’s church…again.

Some people only go to church on major holidays, like Christmas and Easter.  But why?  Because they’re supposed to?  Do we even know what exactly we’re celebrating today?  Easter is the day we celebrate to remember the resurrection of Jesus.

Of course it’s more in-depth than that…

So, at church we have or will have gone through when Jesus entered into Jerusalem on a donkey (read about this in Matthew 21; Mark 11; Luke 19; John 12;), The Last Super (Matthew 26; Mark 14; Luke 22; John 13), and possibly Jesus praying about the prophecy (Matthew 26; Mark 14; Luke 22).love-699480_1920

Then Jesus went on trial (Matthew 26, 27; Mark 14, 15; Luke 22; John 18), he was crucified (Matthew 27; Mark 15; Luke 23; John 19), he rose from the grave (Matthew 27, 28; Mark 15, 16; Luke 23, 24; John 19, 20), and then possibly the ascension (Matthew 28; Acts 1).  But we may have looked over something…

During all of these things going on surrounding the big Easter story, Jesus went about things as was normal of him.  He healed many people, and taught even more.  After he had sent people on mission to teach and heal.

Martha and Mary

During this, he had stayed at a home.  The sisters, Martha and Mary were to serve Jesus and those he was teaching and healing.  While he was speaking, Mary sat at his feet to listen.  This agitated Martha.  So, she approached Jesus and said, “Doesn’t it bother you that Mary has left me with all the burden of serving you and the home, My Lord?  She is acting lazy.  Send her away so that she can help me.”

Jesus told her, “Martha, your burdens are heavy and you are upset about many things.  Mary understands what is more important, and she has chosen to do the better thing.  I will not make her go.”  (Luke 10:38-42)

Where does this fit?

Well, when I read this, I think of myself.  Then I think of all those who are NOT running about like a chicken who has lost its head.  The ones who are NOT so focused on if the kids and husband are dressed in the proper attire, and look as if they rolled out of bed as if they came straight from a magazine.  The ones who are NOT worried about the perfect recipe, centerpiece for the table, and Easter baskets for the entire tribe of family who arrived (with any surprise people in between.)

We miss out on so much when we do all this.  Today, we need to sit back and actually listen and see what is important.  Jesus died for our sins and HE IS RISEN!  Let’s wake up, mommies.  Why are you going to miss out on the giggles and laughter, just to stress and worry about getting everything perfect.  Let’s open our ears and our eyes.  Hear and see what is important today.

And remind yourself, it doesn’t matter how hard you try.  The dress you wear isn’t going to matter tomorrow.  The toys that were bought will be broken down the road.  But the message today…that will stay with us.  All the family around us…we will miss if we don’t pay attention.

Seriously, mommy, sit back and enjoy the day.

It’s perfect already, for HE IS RISEN!

Slowing it Down

This week I’ve been slowing things down.  Here comes a holiday, and I feel a bit worthless…or I did at first.  But, I think this is the first week prior to Easter I have REALLY enjoyed…or gotten to enjoy, not sure, in years.  Why is that…well, I’ve had no choice, but to slow down.

I finally have it through my head that I have got to slow down, or I’m going to force myself into another seizure.  Which, I really don’t want to scar my children with another.  Not to mention, they’re horrible.  And I really don’t like the aftermath of loosing so much memory and everything else that goes with it.

Other family members have had to slow things down due to health as well.  Some it is their schedule.  Or some just want to spend it with their close family.  And, do you know what?  It’s great!easter-1237591_1920

Yes, I miss my family, and would love to have the whole big gathering.  But, what happens is that I (along with a select few) will be expected to do the majority of the before, during, and after work.  But, this year that wouldn’t be true.  Everyone would be so busy telling me to sit down, all worried about me.  Which will bug me so much that I’ll go off somewhere where no one can see me help, or try to sneak it in elsewhere.  Then the next week or so, I’ll be recovering.  Meanwhile, someone will have gotten sick from someone else at the family party…and so has been the past few holidays for us.

So, yeah,  today I’m going to bake with the buggies, and color Easter eggs.  Then we’ll go hunt eggs at the church and come home and NOT stress about getting this that and the other thing done before tomorrow.   We will laugh and giggle and probably eat more junk than we all need to.

Tomorrow, we’ll go to church.  Look cute in our new dresses (or the buggies will.)  Then we’ll come home and eat whatever we decide and continue with a happy family together day.

What are YOU going to do this weekend?cooking-1271605_1920

In the Spirit

In the spirit of holidays and everything I’ve been talking about this week, I’m going to keep it up here as well.

So far we’ve talked about writing to get you out of depression or a funk.  One of the many ways I’ve suggested was to keep a journal or a diary.  There are so many types of journals out there, so what type should you try?female-865110_1920

All of them…

Seriously, though.  Trying all types is the best way you will find your perfect one.  And who knows, you may end up wanting to keep many styles for different reasons.  One of the big things you should keep a list of right now, is your to do lists.  Watch what you’re doing this week through lists, by writing the lists in your journal.  Throughout the day, cross off what you’ve gotten done.

Why?

By keeping a list in your journal, you’re less likely to throw it away, and I want you to keep it to see how things change, and what this week does to your funk (that’s what we’ll call it for now.)  For me, or anyone else with similar issues, my health as well.  How do you feel, before, during, and after.

Keep doing this throughout the holidays this summer.  All the trips, all the birthdays.  Watch who does what and who follows through helping.  A few weeks after each event, look back at the list.  Then, write down what you feel and think about how it went.  Did you get enough help?  Did you spend all the money?  Was it a large, extravagant event?  Who decorated?  Did you make all the decorations by hand?

If you’re answering yes to the majority of these questions, then no doubt about it you are doing WAY too much.  And the stress to get everything done and perfect will add to your funk or any health, marital issues, or anything else that may not quite be right in your life.

These are supposed to be family events.  And surely it isn’t a wedding or anything like it.  So, again, why do we do this to ourselves?

HOMEWORK!!!

Two things, today.  Start that journal, for one.  And second, can you give me an example of a journal type?  Lets see if you can find any I haven’t found yet…